Is this poem/rap any good?

nice! But when making a song, learn to fix your lyrics. Me, I don't want to include nonsense words on my songs such as bad words, words that go around and at the end it gives you nothing. good example of rap was eminem's in love the way you lie, it seems like a story/ continously and the topic is all about somewhat of being betrayed. compose with the use of heart and write using your pen with the help of the brain. let the viewers feel your song, so if you just write anything you want our head will spin even faster than top. besides, you do great job. no bad vibes, that 1 point of comment from me is for your improvement! =)